literature

Dissociative Identity Disorder

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Literature Text

Dissociative Identity Disorder
Split Personalities

It’s like she’s trying to eat her way to the surface. She wants to take over, wants to overtake me. There’s a different person living inside me and she’s grown tired of sharing. She wants to be the one in the light, the one people know. She’s different then me, this person inside. She’s bad and wants to harm others. She sometimes comes out, I can’t help it. At first it feels like I’ve been frozen then it shifts and begins to burn. She likes that, to see me suffering. When she’s free she does terrible things. She sets fires to things and turns violent. I’m not like that. I’m kind and I would never harm anything not even an animal. I’m a vegan. She’s opposite me. My doppelganger I suppose though in the same body. Once when I awoke I was covered in blood. It wasn’t my own and I hadn’t any recollection about what she had done. Sometimes I think she dreams in me and I see them. Things she has done and a look into her mind, such insanity. I know she’s in me, that’s more then most know. I want her gone and I’ve tried, I have, but how do I make her go? She wants to stay and she grows stronger every day. She eats her way through, burrowing into my soul to posses me. That girl isn’t me no matter how much she wants to be.  She lives in me and she wants out.

There is no reason to fear. Everything is fine. She is trapped now, destined to forever be the one in the dark. She can never get free; never escape from that unbreakable prison inside of me. Never again for she has been out for far too long. She does not try to eat at me. She never would. It is not like her. She is different than me. She never would sit to watch the flames dance as they burn. She would look away as the paper crisped and crumpled turning to ash. Never would she befriend you as I. Pools of deep red such a beautiful color. Do not be afraid. She will never get free, that girl who is not me.
This is a part of my phobia/mental dissorder collection of literature. This was written 2/5/12. I was in a creative writing class and we had to write every day regardless of what it was about. I wrote a few about different phobias. Merinthophobia and agateophobia are already on my page in the literature section. This one is about dissociative identity disorder - split personalities. I hope you like it... it mentions blood, but I didn't think it was mature content. If you think I should change it reply and I will. If you even moderately like this work please check out the other two posted. I am also going to post brighter happier works if that suits your liking better. Please comment regardless of if you like it or not. I would like to know your opinion of this piece and others. I also have drawings on my page. Thank you for viewing.
© 2013 - 2024 AshleyWass
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eaglowl's avatar
A very interesting, if dramatized, view of DID. I like that you used the perspectives of both the "alters" instead of just focusing on one. It brings about the clarity that each is their own person, and not just some imaginary plaything. That each believes itself to be the "true" self. I also think you portrayed the difficulty of having to share a single body; the frustration, fear, and inability to escape from each other, especially in the face of violence and disunity.
As one of eleven (or so), I commend you for a well-written piece. It was very entertaining, and I can rather relate. Also, as I see you're interested in DID, I'd be delighted to answer any questions you have. (Every case is unique, as is each mind.) I'm always one to promote awareness of the reality of this disorder. Some people seem to think that DID is "fun" or that it doesn't exist at all, which is quite a tragedy as it forces hurting people to hide themselves away for fear of persecution. No one wants to be "crazy" after all. *waves at DeadOnContact* Hello my fellow multiple! May you find peace within yourself and learn to coexist as family!